A Hat for an Alchemist
by FlamingFlyingFoxOfDoom
Summary: Edward Elric ends up crashing into the world of Gloomverse. Somehow he ends up staying at Wallis's home, and the alchemist and magician don't get along very well. Confusion over hats and magic arises, loud arguments take place, and a villain lurks in the shadows...


"Stupid fucking asshat." Harold mumbled, arms cross over his chest as he stormed down the street. Passerbys looked away from him, afraid to catch the angry magician's attention. Clouds covered the sky above, limiting the amount of sunlight hitting the ground and adding to Harold's gloomy appearance.

He continued mumbling things of similar nature when he was shaken out of his stupor by a sudden bright flash of light, followed by a deafening crash. Harold winced, biting down on the candy cane in his mouth so hard it broke. He watched numbly as the larger part of the cane fell to the ground, as well as sudden sheets of rain.

Sighing, Harold took his hat off, reached into it, pulled out another candy cane and stuck it in his mouth. The rain made quick work of plastering his hair to his face. Mumbling about his misfortune, Harold reached deep into his hat and pulled out a large, mushroom-shaped lollipop. He propped the treat up on his shoulder, using its dome as a deformed umbrella. Water poured over its edges, forming sweetly-flavored puddles by Harold's feet.

Just as he was about to go on his way again, another loud, crashing noise sent Harold flying forward, face planting into a forming puddle while his misfit umbrella shattered around him. He pushed himself off the ground, sputtering and spitting out sour water. He glared over his shoulder, scowling at whatever caused his trip.

Slumped against the wall, surrounded by trash cans and their scattered contents, was a small blond in a red coat. Harold stumbled to his feet, grabbing the stick of his former lollipop-umbrella as he did so. He strolled over to the blond, poking them with the stick.

"Hey." Harold said "Are you dead?" The blond offered no response. Harold looked around the street, left and right, checking for anyone. When it was evident there was no one around, Harold knelt down and started ruffling around the blond's coat. "Let's see if you got anything good-"

Just as he was talking, Harold was thrown back by a punch to the face. The blond seemed to be awake now, glaring at him with golden eyes that seemed to shine in the bleakness of that day.

"Back off!" the blond, evidently a boy by the voice, spat at him.

Harold rubbed the cheek where he was hit, glaring at the boy with a scowl. "Uh...nice to meet you too."

"You tried to steal from me!" The boy snapped.

"Fair point." Harold said as he got to his feet. He adjusted his hat as he stood. The boy stumbled to his feet, one hand clutching tightly on his side, the other using the wall to support him. Harold tilted his head. "You hurt?"

"No, my ribs are normally broken." the child growled. Harold frowned, watching him through red eyes. Carefully, as if approaching a feral beast, Harold approached.

"So you need help?" he asked.

"I'm fine!" The boy spat, taking a hasty step back. His foot caught on a banana peel from the spilt garbage, and he was sent tumbling to the ground. Harold winced as the boy made impact with the ground.

"You sure?" He offered his help again.

"I'm fine." The boy said again, grimacing as he managed to get back to his feet. He shot a golden glare to the Candy Magician. "Did you take anything?"

"No, you punched me in the face before I got a chance." Harold said. He turned, beginning to stroll away before he was cut off.

"Hey!" Yelled the boy. Harold turned to look at him, after rolling his eyes. The boy seemed nervous, eyes darting around. "Uh….where are we?"

Harold told him the street name. The boy didn't seem to recognize it, so Harold told him the city's name. Again, the boy didn't know it, so Harold told him the name of the country.

"Gloomverse?" The boy repeated, sounding just as confused.

"You must be either really lost or some sort of amnesiac, considering that's the name of the country." Harold said.

The boy stared. "...Are you messing with me?"

"No." Harold said "Listen, it's kind of wet and cold and I don't feel like talking anymore."

The boy scowled "Fine. Get out of here then."

"Alright." Harold said and turned to leave. He took a few steps away when a familiar duo entered his vision.

"Harold, there you are!" Assistant hollered, running up towards him. Behind her, Seaweed trotted leisurely along.

"Hey Assistant. Hi Seaweed." Harold said "What's going on?"

Assistant stared at him a moment, baffled. "Well, you and Wallis got into that fight, and we were worried about you after you stormed off, so, y'know. We went lookin' for you."

"Oh. That was nice of you." Harold said. The boy in the red coat was still clutching onto his side, glaring at the group.

"Who's that?" Seaweed said, motioning to him. The boy grumbled something, turning away from them and trudging through the garbage.

"Eh. Some kid." Harold said.

"He looks like he's hurt." Assistant said with a bit of a frown. She walked past Harold toward the red-wearing child and smiled softly. "Do you need help?"

"Not if you're with that jerk." The kid scowled.

"Who? Harold?" Assistant blinked, looking back over her shoulder "Oh, he's just in a bad mood. Don't mind him."

"He tried to steal my stuff!" The kid snapped.

"And that's 'cause he's a dick." Seaweed offered helpfully. She walked over so she was standing next to Assistant. "Seriously kid, you look pretty banged up. We can help."

The child glared at them, judging them with his eyes. After a moment or two, he seemed to relax and gave a slow nod. "Alright. Not like I have a choice."

"Great. I'm Seaweed, by the way."

"I'm Ed." The boy, Ed, said.

"And I'm R-"

"That's Assistant." Seaweed introduced her, unaware of the fact she just cut off the rainbow-haired teen. Assistant shot her a glare, then simply sighed in defeat.

"Yeah. Uh, let's get you to a hospital or something." she said "You look pretty badly hurt."

"And we kinda owe ya after Harold was such a dick to ya." Seaweed said, a hand on her hip "Can ya walk just fine? Do ya need help?"

"Yeah, I can walk." Ed said.

"Awesome. Now to find your hat…." Seaweed murmured, looking around. Ed blinked, arching an eyebrow.

"I don't have a hat." he said.

"Oh. Cool beans. Makes this easier." Seaweed said.

"Oh! I don't have a hat either." Assistant chirped, a smile forming on her face "So it's not that big a deal, don't worry, okay?"

"I wasn't worried." Ed muttered. Assistant's face fell as a light blush crept across her cheeks.

"Uh. Yeah. Okay."

"Makes you seem really immature about it." Harold commented.

"Shuddup!" "Stop being a dick." "Haha…." Ed, Seaweed, and Assistant said over each other.

"Anyway, let's get you to the hospital." Seaweed said "It's this way."

* * *

 **A/N**

 **This is my first time writing the Gloomverse cast, so I'm sorry if they seem OOC. This takes place before the Cakegirl Arc, so Assistant still has her leg but doesn't have her hat.**


End file.
